Wooden Heart by Dan Smith (Listener)

We’re all born to broken people on their most honest day of living and since that first breath we’ll need grace that we’ve never given. I've been haunted by standard red devils and white ghosts and it's not only when these eyes are closed. These lies are ropes that I tie down in my stomach, but they hold this ship together tossed like leaves in this weather and my dreams are sails that I point towards my true north, stretched thin over my rib bones, and pray that it gets better but it won’t, at least I don’t believe it will. So I've built a wooden heart inside this iron ship, to sail these blood red seas and find your coasts. Don’t let these waves wash away your hopes. This war-ship is sinking, and I still believe in anchors pulling fist fulls of rotten wood from my heart, I still believe in saviours, but I know that we are all made out of shipwrecks, every single board washed and bound like crooked teeth on these rocky shores. So come on and let’s wash each other with tears of joy and tears of grief and fold our lives like crashing waves and run up on this beach. Come on and sew us together, tattered rags stained forever. We only have what we remember. 

I am the barely living son of a woman and man who barely made it, but we’re making it, taped together on borrowed crutches and new starts. We all have the same holes in our hearts. Everything falls apart at the exact same time that it all comes together perfectly for the next step, but my fear is this prison that I keep locked below the main deck. I keep a key under my pillow, it’s quiet and it’s hidden and my hopes are weapons that I’m still learning how to use right, but they’re heavy and I’m awkward, always running out of fight. So I’ve carved a wooden heart, put it in this sinking ship hoping it would help me float for just a few more weeks because I am made out of shipwrecks, every twisted beam, lost and found like you and me scattered out on the sea. So come on let’s wash each other with tears of joy and tears of grief and fold our lives like crashing waves and run up on this beach. Come on and sew us together, just some tattered rags stained forever. We only have what we remember.

My throat it still tastes like house fire and salt water. I wear this tide like loose skin. Rock me to sea if we hold on tight. We’ll hold each other together and not just be some fools rushing to die in our sleep. All these machines will rust I promise, but we'll still be electric shocking each other back to life. Your hand in mine, my fingers in your veins, connected. Our bones grown together inside. Our hands, entwined. your fingers in my veins, braided. Our spines grown stronger in time because our church is made out of shipwrecks from every hull these rocks have claimed, but we pick ourselves up, and try and grow better through the change. So come on y'all and let’s wash each other with tears of joy and tears of grief and fold our lives like crashing waves and run up on this beach. Come on and sew us together. We're just tattered rags stained forever. 

We only have what we remember.